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Libertine, I'm glad you enjoyed this!
posted by
SpitFire70
on November 28, 2005 at 10:54 PM
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Okay, people, um, like, what just happened here?
Why is it that I'm feeling that not only have I missed something in
my own post, but also feeling quite unintelligent right now?
posted by
SpitFire70
on November 28, 2005 at 10:45 PM
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TBGroucho,
You're right, I try to work that into every conversation: like, "I'll have a split shot latte' with eggnog and skim milk, which the advent of the Industrial Age and the rise of the Middle Class has provided the means of production for and given me the means to purchase". Notice how I changed the verb to "advent", so it's technically not plagiarism. You'll have to have a savvy lawyer to prove that one.
posted by
Blanche.
on November 28, 2005 at 8:28 PM
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blanche
the key to success in most academic programs is this phrase:
"the Industrial Revolution and the rise of the middle class."
posted by
tbgroucho
on November 28, 2005 at 8:18 PM
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TBGroucho,
I heard that if you read Beowulf, all you have to do is substitute the words "Blood", "Virgin" or "Sword" and you'll get the meaning out of context. But I'm not really up for that. Thanks for the reassurance. (Hi, Spitfire)
posted by
Blanche.
on November 28, 2005 at 8:11 PM
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blanche
you'll be fine, then. To paraphrase Woody Allen, at least you won't be in something where they make you read
Beowulf!
posted by
tbgroucho
on November 28, 2005 at 8:03 PM
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TBGroucho,
a Masters in some kind of counseling, I haven't worked that out yet. I'm still researching programs.
posted by
Blanche.
on November 28, 2005 at 8:00 PM
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blanche
what will be your major?
posted by
tbgroucho
on November 28, 2005 at 7:59 PM
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TB,
Oy. I'll be in the 9th circle of something, all right.
posted by
Blanche.
on November 28, 2005 at 7:57 PM
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Zoot
yes i am.
posted by
tbgroucho
on November 28, 2005 at 7:57 PM
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blanche
"Abandon hope all ye who enter"!
posted by
tbgroucho
on November 28, 2005 at 7:56 PM
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tbg
You are not right!!!
posted by
Holy_Grail
on November 28, 2005 at 7:53 PM
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Groucho,
Oh, you are bringing back the howwow, the horrow, of academia on which I'm about to embark. I need an Academese to English dictionary and a sherpa to get through the mountain of b.s.
posted by
Blanche.
on November 28, 2005 at 7:51 PM
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The chicken traversed the asphalt-filled thoroughfare
An awareness of the sociological and historical data concerning fowl of the era is crucial to a comprehension of the imperatives implied in the initial query. Responses often vary from region to region and across temporal as well as geographical landscapes. In early Twentieth-Century France, explanations for the fowl movement would have considered the enormous effect of changes in the institutions of agriculture as well as increased interest in mechanized culture (e.g., cinema, the railway). Under Stalin, the Soviet reponses were rumored to be (perhaps by counter-intelligence operatives in the western media) along the lines of "the chicken attempted to escape the inevitable turn of history and was incorporated into the Third Five-Year Plan," (translation: sent to the gulag), whereas in the earliest days under Lenin, the chickens were clearly mirror images of the exploited class (the subtle influence of master film-maker Sergei Eisenstein on the makers of Chicken Run is worth considering in this context).
There are numerous other examples here, but the point is made.
In the current climate of academic life, the most practical response is as follows:
The chicken traversed the asphalt-filled thoroughfare in order to facilitate mobility to a location perceived to be more desirable viz a viz: the geographical point directly opposite that point which was its location at the commencement of the traversing, or if you prefer, traversation.
Such a response is comparatively free of specific ideological underpinnings is arguably as objective a reply as possible, stating as it does the obvious.
All this is explained in my doctoral this:
Fowl and Transit: Existential Symbolism, Narratological Discourse, and Allegorical Modes of Alienation in Twentieth-Century Comedic Folklore.
posted by
tbgroucho
on November 28, 2005 at 7:50 PM
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I don't know how I missed this. I loved it!!!!
posted by
Holy_Grail
on November 28, 2005 at 6:52 PM
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LittleMsP,
Why thank you. And I miss you, ya know that?
I'm sorry I haven't been around too much recently but I just have SO much going on. I promise to catch up!!
posted by
SpitFire70
on November 27, 2005 at 3:57 PM
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LOL - You did a great job with these Spitfire!
posted by
littlemspickles
on November 27, 2005 at 4:17 AM
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Totally LOL, Ciel!!!
posted by
SpitFire70
on November 1, 2005 at 6:15 PM
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Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because it was too far to go around.
posted by
Ciel
on November 1, 2005 at 8:49 AM
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That we are, jacenta! Woo Hoo!
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 14, 2005 at 6:31 PM
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Yup, SpitFire70,
I knew, that you knew, that I knew, that you knew, that she was headed for the unemployment office. We both must be really smart!!!! Darn, we are good. Ha-Ha
posted by
jacentaOld
on October 14, 2005 at 5:49 PM
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jacenta, I KNEW she must be heading for the unemployment office.
Now, me feels kinda smawt.
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 14, 2005 at 5:32 PM
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SpitFire70,
Yes, of course the chicken crossed the road because the egg she laid wasn't golden, thus she was headed for the unemployment Office. She was a chicken that knew her bologna and her ABC's. She put 2+2 together and realized that it was almost chore time and the farmer would most cetainly be having her for dinner. Right in his big steel kettle. ha-ha
posted by
jacentaOld
on October 14, 2005 at 5:24 PM
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Factor,
Sorry there are so many. At least no one got mad at me for their answers! (As far as I know!)
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 14, 2005 at 4:36 PM
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But, jacenta, what's on the other side of the road?
The employment office? hehe
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 14, 2005 at 4:35 PM
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I was trying to pick out my favorites.
But there were too many really funny responses...
posted by
FactorFiction
on October 14, 2005 at 10:23 AM
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SpitFire70
The chicken crossed the road because he didn't lay a golden egg.
posted by
jacentaOld
on October 14, 2005 at 7:42 AM
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JJ, actually, I'm really not all that interested in chickens
but if you wanna, go for it!
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 13, 2005 at 12:45 PM
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Spiff,
K, I'll go look in the dictionary, maybe in the clictopedia. I'll let you know about chickens. It's quite essential that this be resolved for public edification.
jj
posted by
Jack_Flash
on October 13, 2005 at 4:08 AM
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LOL curator....
Very nice....however, applies to living things only....now, if the question were, "why did the chicken walk over the farmer?" ....I could have some problems presenting the "we are all one" theory in court with my client.
Jesus, now I really sound like that damn answer!
posted by
Temple
on October 12, 2005 at 6:16 PM
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Brimstone,
Glad you enjoyed it! (And I'm so glad to see you around again!)
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 12, 2005 at 6:00 PM
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Strat,
Let me know what happens. And stay out of trouble this time, K?
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 12, 2005 at 6:00 PM
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curator, okay then.
I'll have to consult Temple on that one. I'm not too educated in Budism, but I'll take your word for it!
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 12, 2005 at 5:55 PM
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Offbeats,
How about Sat or Sun night? Email me and lemmie know.
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 12, 2005 at 5:53 PM
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JJ,
K, um, chickens are female. Roosters (male chickens) are boys. A hen is another word for a female chicken. Are we really discussing this?
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 12, 2005 at 5:52 PM
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This is good!
posted by
bwFrampton
on October 12, 2005 at 5:23 PM
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ROFLMAO!!!!!
Damn, Young Miss, now I gotta cross the road! Or something.
posted by
strat
on October 12, 2005 at 10:23 AM
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Woo!
There is no chicken. There is no road. All is one in Buddha mind.
(Alternatively:)
OMG! Who let my pet chicken out!?
posted by
curator
on October 12, 2005 at 10:14 AM
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Spiffy
I am ready when you are!!!
posted by
Offy
on October 12, 2005 at 4:46 AM
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Spiffy,
Why is it that everyone insists on referring to the chicken that crossed the road as HER or SHE? Is there some sort of gender hangup? A chicken can be a rooster or a hen. Are we witnessing some kind of DDT (Discriminational Disorder Trauma) here?
You know why the chicken crossed the road? Well, if it was a hen she was looking for some grain or seeds to get into her pecker. If it was a rooster, he was looking for a hen to get his pecker into. In any case, neither of them knew what a road was. They both had their minds on chicken matters, and had no idea they ever crossed a road.
I once interviewed a chicken: ''Why did you cross the road?'' I wanted an answer then and there so I could tell all of the nitwit people who kept asking me that question.
The chicken replied, ''Cross the what?'' Obviously, I was going to get nowhere. I left, letting her stuff her pecker with seeds while the rooster crept on her to stuff her with his pecker. Need I say more? That's straight from the chicken's lips. jj
posted by
Jack_Flash
on October 12, 2005 at 3:37 AM
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Lensman,
Thanks. Glad you enjoyed it!
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 10, 2005 at 6:39 PM
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Scoopy,
I can't remember, but didn't you catch the first one? (You were listed on that one.) I forgot if you commented or mentioned it. Oh well. Glad you liked it!
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 10, 2005 at 6:37 PM
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Spitfire...
Haha...you nailed me. I believe I would/did go and help a seagull in distress But I've been known to eat chickens (You've got a funny and perceptive eye there...)
posted by
Lensman
on October 10, 2005 at 6:37 PM
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Thanks, Symph!
Glad ya liked it
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 10, 2005 at 6:36 PM
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Luv it!
posted by
scoop
on October 10, 2005 at 6:21 AM
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hahaha so very funny...hahahaha
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 10, 2005 at 5:46 AM
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Taps,
Glad ya got a good chuckle here!
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 9, 2005 at 10:47 PM
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Spitfire, They were all good but I laughed out loud at SYMPHONY. HAHAHAHAHA
posted by
TAPS.
on October 9, 2005 at 10:45 PM
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Glad you liked it all, katray!
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 9, 2005 at 10:38 PM
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Offbeats,
Weird, hih? Oh well. I'm used to weird. Anyway, let me know when you want to do that thing we talked about. My schedule is open a few nights between now and the 26th. After that, it will be open again after 10/31.
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 9, 2005 at 10:37 PM
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Wow Spitfire, this is great, LOL!
You surely got us all pegged, even Blogit staff.
posted by
Katray2
on October 9, 2005 at 7:51 PM
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Spiffy
Yes, that is freaky...like we need another "freaky" thing going on right now!!LOL!!
posted by
Offy
on October 9, 2005 at 6:29 PM
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Holy crap, Offbeats...
I just commented on one of your blogs at the EXACT time you just commented on mine. I'm hearing spooky music now....
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 9, 2005 at 5:54 PM
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Spiffy
Great, only now I don't even remember the post, much less the darn chicken question. Did the chicken make it to the other side and what the hell was his reason for wanting to be there in the first place? Well, I have looked at the comments and can only determine the darn thing didn't make it...there's a lot of talk about "wings" ya know what I mean? I ordered them not too long back, I can't think about that now, maybe they were related, I didn't ask, I ate....
posted by
Offy
on October 9, 2005 at 5:52 PM
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Ha! Great comment, Flight!!! Perfect!
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 9, 2005 at 5:43 PM
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Spitfire...Question: If you could do this all over again, could it get any funnier?? Never mind.....I'll answer that for you: NO!!
posted by
reasons
on October 9, 2005 at 5:25 PM
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Why, thank you MayB!
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 9, 2005 at 4:56 PM
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In two words: brilliantly observed
posted by
Azur
on October 9, 2005 at 4:54 PM
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Oops, sorry, J-Mom.
I forgot.
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 9, 2005 at 4:39 PM
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Spitfire
You know you should not be advertising all the family secrets even if it is an adopted family secret. Is that adopted secret or family? hummmm!
posted by
Justi
on October 9, 2005 at 4:32 PM
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Holy Crap, Justsouno!
The Blogit Socket Award? Have you gotten into the funny mushrooms again?
Thank you so much for the flattery!
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 9, 2005 at 4:30 PM
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Spitfire
That is just the best. Now don't you worry your pretty little head one bit Mama is going to Blogit people and demand you receive the BLOGIT SOCKET AWARD for the very best, I say the very best literary journalism on any blogging network!
posted by
Justi
on October 9, 2005 at 4:21 PM
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blackcat,
Glad ya liked it!
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 9, 2005 at 3:57 PM
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OMG... that was worth 4 months of waiting... very good! ROFL
posted by
-blackcat
on October 9, 2005 at 3:17 PM
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