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MayB
That's interesting. For me, to help people is a life-long dream. I tried the paramedic thing, but it turned out to be not what I thought it was. I've read some really good books but have never pursued the author along the same lines. I do know, however, that the allure of making money and having success can dampen the spirit of why the book was written in the first place.
posted by
avant-garde
on November 4, 2005 at 12:52 AM
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Joe Love, exactly right although there may be some altruistic exceptions. This guy I was communicating with wanted me to write about him to help him sell his book but his manner and attitude mean that I won't.
posted by
Azur
on November 3, 2005 at 10:04 PM
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MayB
I once read a book about writing "columns". In this book, it was explained that anybody could be an expert on ANYTHING. The trick was making people BELIEVE that you were an expert on your suject/field. As I read this article, it became clear to me that the self-help writers AREN'T necessarily out to "help" others. They are writing their book to SELL IT.
posted by
Joe_Love
on November 3, 2005 at 9:37 PM
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Ca88andra, I subsequently tried a different tack with that author and it was the same deal. He was highly recommended by other well-known inspirational people I know who must know him. Clearly he has not shown this side to them. It makes me wonder if he is one of those people who is only nice to people who can help him or maybe he just had a bad week
posted by
Azur
on November 3, 2005 at 3:12 PM
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Tigerprincess, it's strange isn't it? A friend told me then name of his guru and it turned out to be the father of another friend of mine. Meanwhile my friend had told me some very "human" stories about his father
posted by
Azur
on November 3, 2005 at 3:08 PM
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No, I can't get into the "self-help" book thing. With some exceptions (giving the benefit of the doubt), I would guess that the person is most helped by the "Self Help" is the author him-"self."
posted by
Tiel
on November 2, 2005 at 11:09 AM
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I agree with Blanche. I'm just playing through. I mean...
hell, none of it has turned out even close to anything I wanted. So it's more a question of seeing what shows up. I think that if one is really attentive, and one has clarity, then there's no need for choice.
If!
posted by
donaldoji
on November 1, 2005 at 10:12 PM
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Mayb,
I think Self-help authors may be like televangelists, they go into with sincere desire to share experience and help others and get diverted by the glitz. My problem with self-help is that I can't get past the "goal-setting" and "dream your vision" part. I have a deep "knowing" feeling as CarolynMoe put it, that life is unfolding according to plan and I'm getting ready for the next act, but it's not according to what I want or my goals.
posted by
Blanche.
on November 1, 2005 at 6:34 PM
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When I was younger, I read a self help book and thought the author was a true genius. However the more I read it, the more I realized she was on some kind of ego trip about what she had gotten through, and really didn't have anything profound to share. On another branch, a more well known author goes on and on in his books about how his wife was the woman of his dreams. This was before he got a divorce. Sometimes it's hard to know who to trust.
posted by
tigerprincess
on November 1, 2005 at 6:12 PM
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Brisbane artist, some authors might be altruistic or start out that way but yes I agree they do tend to package the same info in different ways.
posted by
Azur
on November 1, 2005 at 4:45 PM
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I have always been a self help junky
but lately I have realised that it is forumlaeically written and many are just rehashing old stuff in new garb,
How do people get qualified? Usually they don't
You can do a course on how to write a self help classic on any ol' thing at all and this blows the idea of pure ultruism right out of the water.
Perhaps the two most reliable self help models are 12 Step and the Gospel.
Both are backed by community support and the idea that anyone who wants to be a guru has automatically shown themselves to be flawed.
Hehehe Catch 22
Hopes things are well,
Jo
posted by
brisbane_artist
on November 1, 2005 at 11:35 AM
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I do read self-help books, but only certain ones, usually recommended. Its a shame you got the wrong feedback from the author.
posted by
Ca88andra
on November 1, 2005 at 2:39 AM
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Although I have read a few "self-help" books, and sometimes subscribe to The Writer's Digest magazine, I had a revelation occur to me in a Dutton's bookstore on Colorado Blvd. in Pasadena in 1985. I was typically going for the Psychology/Self-Help material, when I had this "deep down knowing" that the real answers lie in the classics.
Characters and stories teach us far more. Like "don't be a chump, Charlie Brown..." things like that.
Thus far, I haven't made it much past the Bible... Can't call any of those guys up, but they obviously pissed the hell out of many people. All but one of the Apostles were crucified like Christ. And the list goes on. Why can the truth be so offensive?
... And I digress.
posted by
cmoe
on November 1, 2005 at 1:41 AM
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Tapsel-T, I don't read many as the style is usually contrived and they do tend to state the obvious AND the people writing them are only human too
posted by
Azur
on October 31, 2005 at 5:49 PM
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MayB, I'm afraid that I find no interest in self-help books, don't read them, have never bought one. (though many have been given to me) I think I just might write one though, one of these days. LOL
posted by
TAPS.
on October 31, 2005 at 4:30 PM
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MayB
It's no illusion that some of us can be so self-absorbed. Who are the ones among the top three in suicides? Psychiatrists. I was once told by a "tough love" editor, that the only real helping hand I'll ever get is at the end of my own arm. Too many "self-help" authors make a living off of that. Be well.
posted by
Hemlocker
on October 31, 2005 at 11:59 AM
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I rarely, if ever, buy into the self-help,
you can do it too, I'll show you how! scheme. The second such "sage" advice comes with a pricetag, it doesn't seem the seller is concerned with my best interests. I won't begrudge another from making a buck, but I don't believe in buying a friend. That's what self-help usually sells more than anything else.
posted by
Talion
on October 31, 2005 at 10:41 AM
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Symphony, good to see you my friend
posted by
Azur
on October 31, 2005 at 10:23 AM
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PatB, yes there is nothing like the scent of an inheritance to bring out the worst in people
posted by
Azur
on October 31, 2005 at 10:23 AM
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it's always disappointing
to find out how self-involved other people can be. Still ticks me off sometimes when I think about certain distant relatives who suddenly had feelings for me when they found out I'd made a little money when I sold my house. Not many people are really interested in helping someone else.
posted by
Pat_B
on October 31, 2005 at 9:17 AM
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Hiya,.....how are you?
hope you are well.....take care
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 31, 2005 at 8:33 AM
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