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Brisbane
Where in Spain are you thinking of living?
posted by
ariel70
on November 17, 2005 at 12:23 PM
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Living in another country
"Their refusal to integrate is an unspoken, patronising assumption that their culture is superior to that of their hosts."
That is strange isn't it? I would hope to live in Spain in the not too distant future. I do want to experience the culture for what it is though.
Jo
posted by
brisbane_artist
on November 17, 2005 at 11:54 AM
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Ariel,
so that's precisely what a donnybrook is! Thanks, I did not know that.
posted by
curator
on November 17, 2005 at 11:23 AM
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Thank you very much for your compliments. God Bless
posted by
Flame-thrower
on November 17, 2005 at 1:38 AM
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Ariel, Bravo! All of the things you describe about the Mother Country can be found here in the New World, happily -- even American expats who refuse to assimilate. ARGUS
posted by
ARGUS
on November 16, 2005 at 6:48 PM
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Ariel70
This is a very interesting post. Seeing through your eyes gives me a measuring stick of sorts. Some of our services here can be long and drawn out, very traditional, then there are people like me who only want the blast furnace and no showing. I see death as a right of passage, I see it as a good thing. I do believe the Catholic's hold the records for the longest of traditional funerals, but I live in an all Catholic area. I keep wondering where they are going to find the space to keep packing them in..I don't understand that mindset that states we must have a large monument, fine engravings, but some of the funerals around here have a procession of no less than 100 cars. That is not unusal. Death, interesting subject. Great post!!
posted by
Offy
on November 16, 2005 at 2:48 PM
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Ariel70
This is a moving article, Ariel70. Just lately I have been reading books on Canada and America's birth and have been surprised at my own surprise when Spain is talked of as a great seafaring nation. I know they were, but in the past few decades all I have ever heard of Spain is, as you say, the cheapo boozed up holidays. One forgets.
posted by
johnmacnab
on November 16, 2005 at 2:38 PM
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Thanks for this post
I found it a very interesting perspective on death and also life - especially the Spanish detractors you mention. I was in La Manga earlier this year and met a number of our British kinsmen on the flight home from Murcia. By the time we landed, I had sought out all of their addresses so that I could be on hand in each congregation when they died, hoping it might be soon.
posted by
malcolm
on November 16, 2005 at 2:30 PM
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ariel70
My father expired 18 years ago and the hurt, grief and loss follows me always. Hot smell of hot home made buns or bread from the oven, people talking in a restaurant, fig cookies, chunks of firewood, homemade noodles, confectionary donuts, our U.S flag and so much more, oh so often, brings back the loss of my father. I adored him as a father, daddy and friend and I will never stop missing him as if it were just yesterday. He is a part of me and I am so much like him. I remember his words, his views and at times I dream he is next to me talking. I touch bubble plastic shipping packing or old coins and he is close to my heart. I accept that he is not here to talk to me, but I still love him so, that this is hard to type. Tears insist on blurring my eyes. Don't think that I haven't accepted the fact that he has died. I have adjusted, but he was and is my foundation and my roots. My honor, love and respect is his forever and I just miss him. If you keep an eye on my posts, I will re-post a story about my dad, that I was unable to write until he had been gone two years, because of the sadness of it all. Then you will understand, why I feel the way I do.
Sorry this turned out to be so long of a comment.
posted by
jacentaOld
on November 16, 2005 at 1:58 PM
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B
Thank you dropping in
posted by
ariel70
on November 16, 2005 at 1:42 PM
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Good post. I have attended different types of funerals and all are solemnly conducted.
(B)
posted by
A-and-B
on November 16, 2005 at 1:41 PM
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Jacenta
Thank you so much. I sense that you have suffered a loss recently. Amd I right?
posted by
ariel70
on November 16, 2005 at 1:37 PM
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ariel70,
Excellent post. I read it the first time you posted, but I don't remember if I left a comment. I know that it was not forgotten. It causes emotion within me. The Spanish way of death is so different then the learned behavior I was taught. The emotions shown and actions differ so much. Maybe that is why death is so tramatic for me. I understand that when a person is suffering that it is release from that pain and suffering, but the loss of those I love is so devastating, because they are just no longer with me. I realize that death is a part of life, still that doesn't make it any easier for me to accept the loss.
Excellent and thought provoking post.
posted by
jacentaOld
on November 16, 2005 at 1:35 PM
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Lisa, Renigade and Babe
Thank you all for your comments. At this rate I'll have to employ a secretary to reply to comments!
posted by
ariel70
on November 16, 2005 at 1:28 PM
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Avant garde
Thank you for the comment
posted by
ariel70
on November 16, 2005 at 1:26 PM
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Curator
Thank you. Very interesting. The Irish call the fight that invariably breaks out at a wake Donnybrooking
posted by
ariel70
on November 16, 2005 at 1:25 PM
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Tiel
Thank you for your nice comment
posted by
ariel70
on November 16, 2005 at 1:24 PM
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What a marvelous post. How it turns on the thoughts. There is always something to ponder from your posts.
posted by
Tiel
on November 16, 2005 at 1:17 PM
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This reminds me
of a story my dad used to tell about watching his Italian and then his Irish relatives at weddings vs. funerals. Italian weddings are riotous, he said, and the funerals filled with weeping and sobbing. The Irish bunch, though, went to weddings all uptight and sober, but the funerals were rager parties; indeed at one he saw an oldster salute the deceased in his coffin by waving a full tumbler of whisky at him and saying, "Ah, Paddy, ye're dryin' up nice."
My Mom's family is German. They just disapprove of everybody in silence no matter what's happening.
posted by
curator
on November 16, 2005 at 12:53 PM
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I think
That for many, death is a welcome reprieve of chronic illness and pain. A cause for rejoicing! That is how I feel, but unfortanately it is a view not held by many stoic, stuffy people who believe that to mourn is to somehow have respect.
I know that our views about death differ, but I feel a kinship in that we are brothers who enjoy examining the life process. I tell you, there is much more than meets the eye or can be captured by a fearful mind.
Very evocative post.
posted by
avant-garde
on November 16, 2005 at 12:26 PM
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Dave
Thank you. yes, I leave no tern unstoned
posted by
ariel70
on November 16, 2005 at 12:16 PM
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Evocative and marvellous. You turn every corner.
posted by
_dave_says_ack_
on November 16, 2005 at 12:12 PM
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Thanks for the post
I've never truly understood our funeral process over here in the US. I remember when I lost my grandpa, everyone cried, wanted me to touch him, then went and ate tremendous amounts of food. I heard very little about him at the service. I decided I don't want a wake, I don't want a burial...I want people that were close to me in life, share and celebrate my life, hanging out on the beach with a campfire is fine. That is the one place I feel most connected at.
My boyfriend is Buddhist, and it seemed like their traditions have merged with the Western traditions, so his grandmother's service was not as different as I had expected.
I think I helped some at my sons' father's funeral, in the fact that it was friends and family sharing stories of their experiences...not much crying. Of course, his became more of a recovery meeting; so maybe that's a bit to the other extreme.
Thanks...you have me giving it some thought.
posted by
LifeByLisa
on November 16, 2005 at 11:09 AM
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I remember the first time I attended a funeral in Thailand...
Sure, people cried, and we went through the mandatory chanting, etc... along with the monks. But during the procession (you are supposed to march alongside the deceased person's body three times) around the temple, things began to "lighten" up. Afterwards, it was almost a party. I was offended. I was more offended that so many people hadn't bothered to dress up, although they wore (in Buddhist tradition) either black or white. By the time I left, however,I had really begun to almost enjoy these festivities.
When I die, I hope my family embraces this type of celebration. Let the kids play, I say. Don't make them sit in some stuffy corner wearing uncomfortable black dresses while people they don't even know cry over the old lady in the casket. Let them have a picnic...
Good post. Sorry to rant. You just brought back memories!
posted by
Renigade
on November 16, 2005 at 7:00 AM
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Food for thought. I live in a rural area and in proximity to three Indian reservations where it is not unusual for people to come together as community to mourn and grieve. It didn't occur to me until I read your post that in many societies this is no longer the norm.
posted by
babe_rocks
on November 16, 2005 at 5:02 AM
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