Comments on I Told Her To Strip

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Wonderful! If only we'd all had, a teacher such as yourself....

posted by anglofinspirtion on April 10, 2006 at 8:24 AM | link to this | reply

You are my number 1! All your posts about writing are giving me

such a good lesson. Not only English lesson. In my case, writing has to be short. My limitations are result of not knowing so many English words. So I have to catch my idea of poem first and then write it with limited number of words. I only hope, that soon, I will be able to write better, what doesn't mean longer.

posted by shypettite on April 9, 2006 at 10:51 PM | link to this | reply

posted by A-and-B on April 9, 2006 at 2:15 PM | link to this | reply

There was also a time

when my articles were described as too flamboyant and pretentious. I hope I have outgrown that style now. In fact I cannot write those styles now even if I am asked to.

I am ashamed to have written like that. Maybe my motive was to pretend to be deep and profound.

posted by una01 on April 9, 2006 at 12:45 AM | link to this | reply

Azur, you forgot "OATMEAL"

There, at least zero more clicks.

Shemya?

posted by majroj on April 8, 2006 at 7:39 PM | link to this | reply

Blogflogger via Azur--- Excellent point by Ms. Flogger. The "sound bite"

mentality has invaded the world of print and we are the poorer for it.

posted by Jazwolf on April 8, 2006 at 3:31 PM | link to this | reply

_Uncle_Dave_

Nice Technique! Loven it and plan to share and employ...

posted by mysteria on April 8, 2006 at 12:28 PM | link to this | reply

Azur

I am in 100 percent with you. Less is more in writing. I learnt from reading knowledge in quote form that one can get across a lot of meaning in just one suscinct sentence.

posted by mysteria on April 8, 2006 at 12:27 PM | link to this | reply

AZUR

I've learned more about writing from Blogit than all my years of school. I believed my own hype and thought I really knew what I was doing. I'm getting better, but I'm still not there yet. Honestly, I doubt I ever will.

When editing, I've realized I "talk" too much when I'm unsure of what I want to say. Fear of not saying enough swings the pendulum in the opposite direction.

posted by Talion on April 7, 2006 at 10:25 PM | link to this | reply

Azur--yes, the notebook is a valuable tool for the writer, and another real

value is habits developed in abbreviated writing. With a pencil in hand, one is more likely to go for the short word, short sentence structure.

posted by scriber on April 7, 2006 at 10:25 PM | link to this | reply

Scriber

That would be same advice my partner would give. He writes that way. I don't because handwriting is not comfortable for me. I do envy him his notebooks brimming with raw ideas

posted by Azur on April 7, 2006 at 10:03 PM | link to this | reply

Azur - I agree (obviously) with the value of "removing the fat" from ...

... any written work, to bring it down to an intense, rich level. - On the other hand, today, with a society possessing the attention spans of gnats, if we don't say what we say in a 'sound bite' format, we lose our reading / listening audience. How sad. Where would "Red Badge of Courage" and a plethora of other works be, if the authors were required to carve their words down to said sound bites. Its difficult to teach how to carve to remove excesses vs. expand to built textuer and mood. - Good post.

posted by blogflogger on April 7, 2006 at 5:49 PM | link to this | reply

Jazwolf - You silly boy. People like to read about "themselves". Ah, the...

... domination of the ever hungry ego.

posted by blogflogger on April 7, 2006 at 5:44 PM | link to this | reply

Interesting. My best advice to those who are a little wordy is write first

with a pencil, in "long hand." And then use a word processer.

posted by scriber on April 7, 2006 at 5:23 PM | link to this | reply

Way to go, Azur!!!

posted by Pat_B on April 7, 2006 at 3:39 PM | link to this | reply

Jazwolf, yes, "BLOGGER A ORDERS BLOGGER B TO STRIP"

That's the kind of headline that gets more play but it'sup to people if they choose to limit themselves in that way.
It's nice in a class when you can help someone see how to tighten up their work

posted by Azur on April 7, 2006 at 2:11 PM | link to this | reply

Azur--- When I helped my students "strip," many were amazed that

full meaning could remain, despite fewer words. Many here could benefit from such instruction as well. I say that selfishly, since it would cut down considerably on the amount of my time required to read most posts. Certainly all who write here have the right to do so as they wish. As to your alternative headline, I think that adding "Blogger" almost certainly would have drawn more readers. Why that's so continues to elude me.

posted by Jazwolf on April 7, 2006 at 9:39 AM | link to this | reply

Dave Cryer

The art of precis ( acute etc) is good for journalism students too. Agreed on the thesaurus. I think that my student's academic writing had also suffered because her work was so long and wordy. When you see a "short answer" that could be said in two pars stretch over a couple of pages you lose the will to live, well it turns you off grading

posted by Azur on April 7, 2006 at 9:07 AM | link to this | reply

M.P.O. That paints a picture

Probably works better for writers of haikus than novelists

posted by Azur on April 7, 2006 at 9:03 AM | link to this | reply

Majroj, guess it should be, "I TOLD THIS BLOGGER TO STRIP"

which would attract some and drive away others

posted by Azur on April 7, 2006 at 9:00 AM | link to this | reply

Refer her to "The Little Book!", (Strunk and White's "Elements of Style")

I almost didn't read your post because of the title. How silly would that be.

posted by majroj on April 7, 2006 at 8:01 AM | link to this | reply

Take care...

posted by _Symphony_ on April 7, 2006 at 7:47 AM | link to this | reply

I think Uncle_Dave's last sentence

sums it up.

posted by malcolm on April 7, 2006 at 1:43 AM | link to this | reply

The Hemingway quote is excellent, and should be borne in mind when you

are first getting anything down, but the stripping back once it is down is an additional task that is well worth performing.

At school I was taught the art of 'precis' (pronounced French-style with an e-acute accent) and we did it endlessly in class - take this paragraph down to 100 words from 120 but keep it faithful; OK, now take it down to 80 words. The skill and the importance of the skill has stayed with me. I use it on Blogit. I write a post in Word, then do a word-count. If it's 500+, then it needs a trim to be acceptable to the audience, but if it's less than 500, then why not trim it anyway to make it look smart. It takes time, though. It takes work.

But you also need to beware of trimming too much - don't want to end up bald and have to wear a wig.

As for teachers and big words: the thesaurus should be grafted onto a child at 11 and then surgically removed at 14.