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well well well what a find it is!
thanks for your enthusiasm and interest.
posted by
marieclaire66
on June 29, 2006 at 2:30 AM
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Marie-Claire
I just now "discovered" you! I wanted you to know that I thoroughly enjoyed your poetry! There is nothing more pleasant than awakening to good music such as yours! Please keep it up; I will tune in often!
posted by
GEPRUITT
on June 29, 2006 at 12:27 AM
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ML1966, since you requested a syllable count, let me first say
1. I agree with your comment that translating from French changes the haiku syllables.
2. Call it modern haiku which are shorter or have fewer than 17 syllables (total) spaced out however you wish
3. You may want to check with MARK from Australia (Markng?) about Karumi, which is a greta genre too.
4. Check put some websits on haiku to get examples from the masters (which you may have done a dozen times already).
HERE ARE THE SYLLABLE COUNTS IN ENGLISH FOR ONE OF TODAY's haki in your series:
your utmost sphere (1+2+1 = 4 syllables, because SPHERE is one single sound)
is but a ball in God’s hand (7 total here, OK)
so putty and small (5 total, OK--although I wouldnot use "so putty" maybe "like putty" although English haiku do NOT use words like "as"; "like"; present participles.
posted by
ILLUMINATI8
on June 28, 2006 at 7:42 PM
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I liked your original format and layout, the repetition etc.
I liked this one a lot. There is a warmth to the refrain. Could well be a song in your heart....poetry and music--the axes of existence. Have a lovely day, YPUN
posted by
ILLUMINATI8
on June 28, 2006 at 4:04 AM
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