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- Go to I have just finished reading a book called 'Ugly' by Constance Briscoe
This book intrigues me! I can appreciate your thoughts raising your child! It is difficult but love is the most important thing to give! Discipline is for them, it will make them stronger, confident adults! I think it will always hurt you more! sam
posted by
sam444
on February 1, 2009 at 2:55 AM
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Constance Briscoe has written another book called Beyond Ugly
which is her story after where Ugly finishes. Are you going to buy Ugly for Ruth or the Oates book? I know with Ugly it makes you think you don't have that much tzores or sorrows after all. I was so angry that she has to have three cancerous lumps removed from her poor little 13 year old breasts because of traumas caused by her mother.
When ever I have had to hit Nir, it is one or two well placed smacks. Usually one and on the buttocks or legs and with a force calculated to sting and not to wound or bruise. If I hit my child and he bruised I would be mortified because I know that I would have hit him with too much force. I don't even like yelling at him but I do and that is what I am working on at present - to use a voice that is encouraging rather than nagging and yelling. Also to use positive rather than negative commands in guiding him.
I need to sit with him more.
posted by
Norwood
on February 1, 2009 at 2:17 AM
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Joyce Carol Oates is the bomb...
I look forward to reading this book. I may buy it for my friend Ruth to read while she is taking chemo...I have a hard time finding books for her because it seems she has read them all, lol. Great post Norwood. Have a good evening :)
posted by
VictoriaP
on January 31, 2009 at 4:10 PM
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The first thing I noticed when my first child was born..
was that he did not come with instructions. you often resort to what your parents did, though you try not to.
posted by
muley12
on January 31, 2009 at 2:14 PM
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Yes I loved the Colour of Water and have read it twice
She was a very devoted Mum. Halachally James is Jewish even though I believe he is a practicing Christian. Incredible story and he writes very well. The story of his mother is sad because she was obviously a very maternal and spiritual person. It is a great credit to her that all her children turned out so well and ended up college graduates despite the poverty and hardships they had to endure.
For me, my life will be totally fulfilled when Nir finishes school and gets a trade or profession to support himself and he is married to a nice Jewish girl with children and he is raising them in the Jewish faith to be proud of their Jewishness. I used to think that he should marry an Israeli sephardi girl because he is darker skinned but you know what, I don't care so long as she is a nice girl and they love each other eventually and build a good Jewish home. I just want to be a Buba or savta one day and play with my grandchildren and help my daughter in law and son as much as I can.
posted by
Norwood
on January 31, 2009 at 1:06 PM
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Raising kids is not easy. I'm just happy those days are behind me - hang in there and raise Nir with love and loving discipline. Also - have you ever read The Color of Water? It's a great book written by James McBride, whose Mom was the daughter of a Jewish man (Rabbi?) who abused her and his father a Black minister. McBrides's Mom was married twice (both times to black men), and had a total of 13 kids, one more accomplished then the next. James writes for the NY Times, and one of his brothers was the Director of Public Health for my city. An amazing story! Mal
posted by
gapcohen
on January 31, 2009 at 8:18 AM
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