Jeff's Jots

People often say "Don't get your hopes up." I say go ahead get your hopes up. Better to have hope and be disappointed than to never have hope at all. Sign in to see full entry.

I went to McDonald's the other day and I had to wait in line for a really long time. Brett Farve was in front of me and couldn't decide what he wanted. Sign in to see full entry.

My ideal wife or girlfriend would have multiple personality disorder. I like variety Sign in to see full entry.

All heterosexual men like to look a women's breasts, but laltely, I've especially enjoyed looking at the space between the breasts. Sign in to see full entry.

"Experts" say that if you don't eat enough fruits and vegetables, you'll become constipated. Well I rarely touch a fruit or vegetable but I haven't taken a laxative in 40 years and my bowel movements are always easy and comfortable. Too much information? Sign in to see full entry.

When I was a kid, my mother would yell at me to clean my room "before your father comes home and throws a fit" I always figured that I should wait until after he came home and threw a fit. At least that way he would have a reason to throw a fit. Sign in to see full entry.

Driving home from visiting my mother in Delaware, I usually stop at a restaurant called Holly's. Coming home after my birthday celebration last month I pulled into what I thought was Holly's. It turned out not to be Holly's but another restaurant connected to a hotel. I thought about pulling out and... Sign in to see full entry.

At my birthday party last month, my aunt asked if I was still writing on blogit. Which probably means she's been reading the stuff I've already written Which means my 82 year old aunt has probably read "My Perfect Puny Penis" Sign in to see full entry.

I have a strange memory. I remember birthdays of kids I went to high school with 35 years ago. But then I'll go out to the parking lot and forget where I parked my car. Sign in to see full entry.

Happened to see a child's report card. It said that the child needed to learn not to call out in class. Well of course she does. We can't have children expressing themselves. What could it lead to? Sign in to see full entry.