Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Thursday, May 16, 2013

Acronyms

Two guys and a girl were sitting at a bar talking about their lives. The one guy says "I'm a YUPPIE... you know, Young Urban Professional." The second guy says "I'm a DINK... you know, Double Income No Kids." They asked the woman, "What are you?" She replied: "I'm a WIFE...you know, Wash, Iron,... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

One day a little boy walked in on his parents doing it and asked what they were doing. The parents' reply was that they were making fish sticks. So the little boy left it at that. A few nights later the little boy walks in on them again, and this time he asks, "Are you making fish sticks again?" The... Sign in to see full entry.

What do Santa's female reindeer do on Christmas Eve while the male reindeer pull his sleigh? Oh, not much... They just head into town to blow a few bucks. Sign in to see full entry.

Last 10 things

THE LAST 10 THINGS A MAN WOULD EVER SAY 10- I think Barry Manilow is one cool mother-fucker! 9- While I'm up, can I get you a beer? 8- I'm absolutely wrong, you must be right! 7- Her tits are just way too big. 6- Sometimes, I just want to be held. 5- That chick on "Murder, She Wrote" gives me a... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

elderly lady

There was a man who really took care of his body. He lifted weights and jogged 6 miles a day. One day, he took a look in the mirror and noticed that he was tan all over except his 'thing.' So, he decided to do something about it. He went to the beach, completely undressed himself and buried in the... Sign in to see full entry.

Sayings on Women's Ts

Don't piss me off! I'm running out of places to hide the bodies. Guys have feelings too. But like... who cares? I don't believe in miracles. I rely on them. Next mood swing: 6 minutes. I hate everybody, and you're next. Please don't make me kill you. And your point is... I used to be schizophrenic,... Sign in to see full entry.

better than an egg

If you think life is bad... How would you like to be an egg? You only get laid once.You only get eaten once. It takes 4 minutes to get hard. Only 2 minutes to get soft. You share your box with 11 other guys. But worst of all... The only chick that ever sat on your face was your mother. So cheer... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, May 12, 2013

3 defs of good date

These three women were roommates. One night they all had all gone out on dates and all came home at about the same time. The first one said, "You know you've been on a good date when you come home with your hair all messed up." The second one said, "No, you know you've been on a good date when you... Sign in to see full entry.

I am woman!

I'm glad I'm a woman, yes I am, yes I am I don't live off of Budweiser, beer nuts and Spam I don't brag to my buddies about my erections I won't drive to Hell before I ask for directions I don't get wasted at parties and act like a clown And I know how to put the damned toilet seat down! I won't... Sign in to see full entry.

No more beans for me!

Once upon a time there lived a woman who had a maddening passion for baked beans. She loved them but unfortunately they had always had a very embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction to her. Then one day she met a guy and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would marry she thought to... Sign in to see full entry.